Friday, April 9, 2010

This Is Where I Began

In the largest bedroom in a two-bedroom apartment in North Hollywood, CA (or West Toluca Lake to those who feel North Hollywood is too "common"). It is here that I've re-evaluated and reinvented my 46-yr-old life.  It is here that I quietly stood up and said, "I'm sorry," to God for all the colossal pain I've caused three, former lovers.  It is here that I realized I must reach out to them, too.  It is here that I finally mustered up the strength and the discipline to write "the great American novel" I've been saying I'd write for years!  Okay, so I haven't finished it yet, but I'm only two chapters away.  And that's damn near ten chapters further along than I was at this time last year!  It is here that I have opened a business.  And closed a business.  It is here that I have felt great about being me.  And woefully embarrassed about being me.  It is here that I see a light at the end of the tunnel.  It is here that I've fully accepted that no matter what JOB I have or HOUSE I live in or CAR I drive or LOVER I take, I am bigger than ALL those things!  This Is Where I Began to love ME.  The tall ME.  The lean ME.  The kind ME.  The selfish ME.  All the different aspects of ME.  This Is Where my new ATTITUDE began.  Thus, this is where my new LIFE has begun. 

Keep me in your prayers...please.

1 comment:

  1. My brotha... you could have named this blog entry "This is when my FREEDOM began!". Freedom is loving you in spite of you. Freedom is knowing a positive attitude is the ONLY attitude. Freedom is being as honest to your wrongs as you are to your rights. Freedom is understanding and respecting others as they come at you in a negative manner. Freedom is setting a goal and making obtaining that goal your reason to live. GOD grants us air, we have to go get FREEDOM. You appear to now have FREEDOM.